In the ever-changing environment in the country today, parents caught up in the hectic struggles of modern life are failing to pay adequate attention to their children. As a result, loneliness, stress, and agitation are increasing among children. Modernization is primarily responsible for this. Reports are constantly appearing in the various states of the country of such violence in which minor children and youth are themselves becoming the reason for the murder of their own parents. The main causes for this situation are the children's [daily]routines, food habits, and ways of working.
In view of these recent incidents involving minor children, The Mooknayak sought the opinion of Dr. Vivek Agrawal, Head of Psychology, KGMC [King George Medical College, Lucknow]. By following the tips given by Dr. Agarwal, you too can save your child from the grim trappings of modern life as well as prevent them from becoming the cause of death of their own parents.
A child's disposition is greatly influenced by their all-round environment
While sharing his experience, Dr. Vivek Agarwal, Head of the Department of Psychological Department, KGMC, said, "Many factors are important here. What is the family environment like? What kind of communication is there between the family members? Also, how much attention are parents paying to their children? Today's environment is such that parents themselves give mobiles to their children at an early age. Parents think that by keeping their children absorbed with their mobiles, they can easily do their own work. With this, children get into the habit of using mobile phones in childhood. Parents remain busy with their work. With time, as the child grows older, and their age increases, it takes the form of addiction. Later, when an attempt is made to control the habit, it becomes difficult to do. When a child is deprived of something after a long period of being addicted to it, then they start getting agitated and become aggressive."
"Just like when someone is a drug addict and when they can not get access to the drug, they get agitated. This happens in exactly the same way," said Dr. Aggarwal.
Bringing up children requires quite a lot of attention. Dr. Aggarwal further explains, "Today, children are handed mobiles right from childhood. Along with this, watching television all day, the more than necessary use of the computer/laptop and playing video games has a significant impact on brain development in children."Several guidelines have been formulated for this as well. If these are followed, such untoward incidents could be prevented.
Mobile addiction – a big problem
"In modern times, because of the excessive use of mobiles by minors, they get addicted to using them. Their busy parents do not pay attention to the time for which minor children are on their mobiles. Due to which, with time, this problem begins to take the form of an affliction," psychologist Dr. Vivek Agarwal told The Mooknayak.
What are the guidelines?
– Children up to the age of2 years should not be given mobiles at all.
– For children aged 2-5 years, half an hour.
– For children aged 5-12 years, one hour, and on holidays, two hours.
– For children above the age of 12 years, up to three hours of usage.
According to Dr. Aggarwal, this matter needs to be given particular attention and includes a mobile, computer, and television usage.
Symptoms
– Reduced interaction of the child with other people in the house.
– Spends most of the time alone.
– Flares up instantly over anything and everything.
– Gets irritated over small things.
– Uninterested in eating food.
– Does not respect elders or ignores them.
– Tends to shout or speaks in a loud voice.
Special attention should be paid to this
Dr. Aggarwal says, "Parents should engage their children in other things as well. Including outdoor games, swimming, cycling, drawing (art), etc. Children should be sent to play in the park. If the children are free when in the house, then they should have things to play with, which will nurture their creativity and also hastens brain development. Along with this, children should listen to music, and they should do activities such as playing a musical instrument. They should also read story books."
What should be done when a child is addicted to their mobile?
Dr. Aggarwal says that, if the child has become addicted to their mobile phone, then a doctor should be consulted. For this, KGMU [King George Medical University] runs addiction clinics every Friday.
In some cases, children with mobile addiction also develop mental health issues. According to Dr. Aggarwal, "ADHD [Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder], also known as short attention span, is such a disorder in which children start experiencing depression and anxiety. In the early stages, such a condition is managed by counseling. If and when needed, some medication will also be given to the child."
Incidents where children put their own parents to death
On June 5, 2022, in Yamunapuram Colony, Lucknow, UP, at 3 am in the night, a 16-year-old minor boy shot dead his mother, Sadhna Singh, while she was deep in sleep. And following this, for two days and three nights the minor stayed inside the house with the body of the mother. He threatened his younger sister that if she told the police or anyone else, he would kill her too. When the stench started spreading on Tuesday, he made up a story and informed his father. According to the police, the husband is a Subedar Major (JCO) in the army, posted in Asansol. Naveen's minor son, also according to the police, is a class 10 student at APS School in Telibagh and addicted to the PUBG mobile game. On coming to know about this, his mother often got angry with him. But the mother's displeasure had no effect on the minor son. When she became very angry, she would even beat him. At the same time, the boy was also obsessed with Instagram. He had made a profile for himself. These details were confirmed from his mobile phone.
Railway officer's daughter shoots mother and brother
On August 29, 2020, it wasR.D. Bajpai's birthday but he was not at home. Executive Director of the Railway Board, he was in Delhi on duty. The home was a government bungalow allotted by the Railwayson Vivekananda Marg in the Gautampalli police station area of Lucknow. Living in bungalow number 9 were R.D. Bajpai's wife Malini Dutt Bajpai and son Sarvadutt Bajpai, and his 15-year-old daughter, a national-level shooter. Wife Malini and son Sarvadutt had planned a video conference that evening to celebrate R.D. Bajpai's birthday. With all the preparations done during the day, mother and son fell asleep on the same bed. In the next room, the 15-year-old daughter, class 9 student and national shooter sat with a 22-bore pistol. At about three o'clock in the afternoon, she came out of the room. Pointing the pistol, she shot a bullet at her sleeping mother. Before her 20-year-old brother, Sarvadutt was able to get up, she also shot him. Both mother and son died on the spot.
Minor in Chhattisgarh kills parents
On 1 March 2022, in the village of Khodhala in the Udaipur police station area of Surguja district of Chhattisgarh, a minor son killed his mother Phulsundari Bai (45) and father Jairam Singh (50), and buried the dead bodies in the house itself. After about five days, the brother of the deceased informed the Udaipur police station that his brother did not appear to be around, after which the Udaipur Police reached the spot and started investigations. Following this, the scene inside the house was shocking.
The child alleged that his parents did not love him so that is why he killed them. In this case of murder, the minor son was taken into custody by the Udaipur Police. During the interrogation, the minor said that the family members did not love him. Because of this, the minor carried a lot of anger toward his parents, and for this reason, the minor went ahead with his action.
Digitization has constricted space
Satya Prakash, COO (Chief Operating Officer) of ChildLine, Gautam Budh Nagar, and FXB India Suraksha, said, "When we were young, there wasn't so much modernization. We all used to go out of the house to play. We use to enjoy spending time with friends and family. But now quite a few changes are being seen [in our lifestyles], which also have had a negative effect. Children are now a lot more dependent on electronic gadgets. Due to this, they have increasingly become more distant from family and friends, which is a matter of concern."
FXB India Suraksha works with children in 13 states
Satya Prakash said that their organization is working with children in 13 states. Government organizations are also continuously working on this matter. There have also been discussions about issuing an advisory regarding this. "First of all, we are focusing on those cases where children's dependence on mobiles is increasing. This rose very high during the time of Covid. It's a matter of concern. Parents need to pay attention to this."
Work being done in 35 education centers
"Our organization has around 35 centers in 13 states. These centers are working together with children. There are four centers in Noida. Work is also being done on how to ensure digital safety for children. This is not an issue limited to one state, such incidents are happening here and there all over the country", explained Satya Prakash.
Need for cultural and moral values
Balbir Singh Mann from Ummid Sanstha said, "This ever-increasing modernization has destroyed our cultural and moral values. We should tell our children about our culture and civilization. Along with respecting elders, they should also be told about illustrious people [adarsh mahapurush], to instill more positive thinking in them.
यहां हिन्दी में भी पढ़ें: एडिक्शन का शिकार हुए उग्र बच्चे क्यों कर रहे माता-पिता की हत्या, जानिए पूरा मामला
[Story Translated By Lotika Singha]
You can also join our WhatsApp group to get premium and selected news of The Mooknayak on WhatsApp. Click here to join the WhatsApp group.